My job fixed my toe!

For years I've done home surgery on my ingrown toenails. I got them from too small shoes on my too giant feet and from smashing them and then picking. Don't pick! Anyway, the toe is almost totally better! Here's what the doctor does:

First he shoved a wooden stabby stick under the nail to drain the gore, then he sliced the length of nail with an x-acto scalpel thing. Then he got cut pliers and YANKED my nail out! I totally could have done that at home with some "cold spray" like they had. I told him I almost had the procedure perfected and he assured me that as soon as i got out of school and had a certificate showing it i could work there.