Friday, October 31, 2008

Jim Rose Circus review

So yesterday I got free tickets to the Jim Rose Circus. I remember the old days when the circus was basically a freak show with The Enigma and the cat face dude. There were tattoo face circus punks who ate lightbulbs and stuff and just weirdos. But I love that stuff. So yesterday, when the opportunity arose, I said yes I want to go!!!!
Well, the show started out with DJ Hawg-Tied who is awesome and then some crappy radio style band that should play cheesy beer commercials. When the actual circus crew began their act it started with a menagerie of hot choreographed chicks and a few freak show-ish people doing a little intro with Welcome to the Jungle playing. Then they brought out act after act: Mark the knife from Israel, Melody Sweets doing burlesque and she is allegedly from Italy. Kenichi the awesome breakdancer and more. But the whole time it was soooooo commecialized. Oh, lets cut up this apple in a man's mouth with a chainsaw, oh look! He cut 2 x's, dos equis, get it?! The whole night was seeming like a Dos Equis commercial and I concluded that Jim Rose was a sell-out and his "circus" was crap. But then came Leonid. He is truly living up to his name. He does an amzing hula hoop act and the smile plastered on his face lets you know why he is the grand finale...he is 7 feet of amazing awesomeness.
Tori and I left feeling satisfied that we went and all because of Kenichi and Leonid. Otherwise the show was pretty much a commercial. Oh, and the people there sucked most! There were so many douchebags that it was hard to not get sick. And to the two tattoo boys (Braids and the Mouth) smoking cigars were the worst! Who smokes a cigar in a club for 2 HOURS!!!!!! It does not make you look cool. It makes you suck.

Now, when I got home I went to sleep. Tori on the other hand had some investigating to do:
If you look through the program from the show, it says that Mark the Knife is from Israel. Try Illinois (according to his myspace). Also, they found him on America's Got Talent...just like Leonid. And Melody Sweets? Not from Italy. LIARS!I can't find any dirt on Kenichi...but Leonid is definitely from far away. AS IT TURNS OUT...these performers ARE NOT from Jim Rose's usual stable of talent (just like we suspected).These folks were hired by Dos Equis, who is doing this nationwide tour as a marketing scheme (which you knew already given how many times they plugged the product.) And the reason no one paid for tickets? Because you don't have to. Dos Equis foots the bill for all of it.
We both feel duped at having to sit through a 3 hour Dos Equis commercial. But Leonid was super rad! Pretty much everyone was from America's Got Talent but it was still a bit much.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Halloween is almost here!

Susie had a party last weekend. I was a polygamist because making fun of another person's religion is funny. Its even funnier when you get two friends to do it too! Our husband was sick and unable to make it though.
PS- those are ghost orbs on the green picture. They aren't on any other shots.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Sometimes I wish..

Sometimes I just wish someone would help me. Even just a little bit.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Little Five Points Halloween Fest- it never disappoints

Ah, its that time of the year again. The Little 5 Points Halloween Fest was this past Saturday and it always proves to be a blast. There is always a huge sense of disorder, which proves time and time again to be a fantastic element to this event. Usually there is a barrage of hearses that begin the parade but this year that didn't happen. I don't know what happened but I want to blame it on the gas crisis of 2008. As usual there was a great number of gory scary corpses and monsters but the clown was the scariest! He was walking with some sort of undead geisha girl and when he offered my friends' child some candy I wanted to scream no! and tackle the child to protect her. And where else can you see hot girls in panties hanging out in the streets? Last year a lot more people dressed super trashy so this time you mostly got buxom pirate babes and a hot rollergirl or 2. There were also these really awesome 8 foot tall day of the dead costume things. They were a spectacular bunch. I wanted to be in one. Actually it would've been awesome to make KISS skeleton things. Some had glowy eyes that tried to hypnotize me. Gonzo (Dustin) of the Swinks Brothers Stunt Show wiped out doing a wheelie but looked fantastic doing it. Then the parade kind of doubled back on itself and became mayhem. A marching band was in formation while packs of pirates and zombies wove their way through in the opposite direction. Ah, good times. Oh, and as a final note, while first saying "poor kitty" I must then say how awesome it is to be able to bring your cat to the parade.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Lets talk cows!

Cow photo shoots are hilarious to watch. We stumbled upon this great scene and I had to watch. They were struggling with a stubborn unhappy cow trying to get it to stand in exactly the right spot. They would offer it snacks and petting and then try to lift one hoof into place and then the other. Then the cow would shift and they would have to start again. They pushed and prodded and poked and tugged. Good times! Also, please notice the tiny goat in the first picture. Or maybe its a tiny lamb. Or sheep. I dunno but it was just hanging out on a leash curled up near its kennel.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The Georgia National Fair!

Last Friday was my half day at work and what better excursion than the fair? It all started with piglet races. They run the track and swim across the pool and the winner gets an oreo. Its adorable! There were tons of horses and we watched a horse show with the Clydesdale type horses and carriages. They sure gussy the horses up for these things! They put all kinds of propellers and windmills in their manes. I personally prefer a more natural look but I guess thats what the judges look for. After horses we met some llamas. The nicest llama was chip and I fed him from my hand. Did you know they don;t have upper teeth and their lips seperate to scoop the food in? Its quite adorable as long as they don't spit on me. The llama in the photo has the most adorable jacked up teeth. They are a mess! But he was also a cutie. The pig barn was the stinkiest. You would think cows would be pretty stinky but no, those pigs made me want to gag!
In an effort to keep this entry at an acceptable length I will make a few seperate posts. Next is cows and chickens!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Someone was mad at Waverly

This beauty was spotted over near Northlake mall on Sunday. Apparently Waverly pissed someone off. If you know him, let him know he should say sorry.

Friday, October 10, 2008

More Freakshow Banners

Last night was craft night. This is one of my favorite nights of the month. Its always a great bunch of ladies and sometimes a gentleman or Chris (thats a joke). Chris is quite nice and Diana is lucky to have found a guy that will craft with her. My boyfriend is not into it and thinks he has no skills. Sigh...what a sad life- no crafting abilities. Anyway, last night we worked on banners some more. I had already prepped mine with the background so it was all ready to go.
I don't know if you can really see it but there is blood splatter on the policeman/bellboy's face from the decapitation. Yeah, I know, what IS wrong with me?! Anyway, someone should be a giant human eating rat for Chris and Diana's party. Additionally, Kathleen created this masterpiece of "quarterman". Its odd, he was called quartman but there was actually a full half. I guess they didn't fractions back in the olden days.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

I hate rain, but I love freakshows!

Its rainy out and all I want to do is sleep. I think I'm depressed. Maybe I'll make some goth art tonight. My boyfriend is being lame, my house is a hell hole of disgust because no one will help me, my dog is still wearing the cone, a shirt, and a booty. The tiny house is at stop and I'm getting no rent from it and life is just tiring. I'm tired of taking care of everyone and no one taking care of me.

On a more positive note I will tell you about my fun sunday. Last Sunday a few of us met at Diana's house to create awesomeness. Diana is having a party on Halloween with the theme of Victorian Freak Show. I am going to be (read this like a carny) "The head of a beautiful woman, the body of an ugly snake!". Obviously its really Madonna. We painted lots of awesome banners to hang on the fences. There's "The big Show" and my snake woman. I plan to make one for "the world's largest rat". Sarah made a very complex one that wasn;t finished when I left but it will be rad. There was one with two reptile frog people and it was hilarious because it exclaimed "They are married!". Blockhead and Half Man/Half Woman were excellent as well. Oh my goodness this will be fantastically executed halloween decor.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Uncomfortable questions at work

A couple of coworkers came out of the conference room a few minutes ago. I overheard "you can always run it by Cassie or Lori, they could answer your questions." I knew I heard my name so I pursued the coworker and asked what they needed. Maybe I was being helpful, maybe just nosy, but I got to the bottom of it quickly: feminine hygiene product dispensers. I was directed to the other coworker who was the original question asker.
I stepped right up and said "don't bother, those things are always empty when you need the item the most, and then you put your 50 cents in and you're even angrier". He stopped me there and clarified that they wanted to know where the feminine hygiene DISPOSAL went. Ooops! Well, thats a whole other issue of anger. I told him that usually they're a silver metal box near the tissue dispenser but those things suck and he should really encourage the owner of the building to just get a service that puts a little can in the back corner of the bathroom because those silver boxes never have liners and "women can be the most disgusting creatures EVER!" I tried to be tactful but talking about women's plumbing and the disposal of products for such events is gross and uncomfortable with your male coworker that you don't talk about these things with.
Tomorrow I'll give you the blog I was going to give you today!

Monday, October 6, 2008

Lemonade Standoff

Hi everyone, I'm writing to make sure you know about Tori. Tori is my awesome friend who needs some odd jobs to a) make some cash to get by and b) write some stories about for her blog. She'll do any number of things: organize a closet, fill bags with sand, take your car to be repaired, pick up dry cleaning, dogsit (she's my partner in the dogsitting world), and probably any number of other things that you could think of. Here's her intro from her blog:

Hi there. Welcome to Lemonade Standoff, this 27-year old freelancer’s adventures and misadventures in yanking the odd job market from the weak hands of your neighborhood youngsters.
Get comfy, take off your shoes…grab a cup of coffee. Or give me a dollar and I’ll do it for you. And write about the privilege.
Don’t feel bad about the kids, its cool. They’re probably too busy watching reruns of the VMA’s, anyway.
How it works:
From now until January 1, 2009 (and potentially beyond), I’m picking up odd jobs. The tedious, the weird, the gross, the questionable and the bizarre. As long as its legal, I’m up for it. Just shoot me an
email and if time permits, we’ll make it happen.
I intend to log the work I do on this blog. I’m promising pictures and many opportunities for potential embarrassment. And heck, maybe we’ll both learn something new along the way. Maybe not, but either way, its gonna be magical. I can just feel it.
Why am I doing this?
I guess you could say that the industry’s been rough on me this year, so I wanted to try a little experiment - a somewhat down-and-out 27 year-old’s take on the good old-fashioned lemonade stand entrepreneur. And, of course, I want it to be funny. Really funny, so that’s why I’m hoping you’ll have something bizarre for me to do. But I’m trying to make dough, too…so anything is negotiable.
To quote the venerable Mr. Willie Nelson, “If you’ve got the money, honey…I’ve got the time.”


So the past two weekends I have gone climbing. Not the kind where you need special equipment or helmets or anything although an escalator would have been nice. No, last weekend Susie and I climbed Stone Mountain. Its the world's largest piece of unearthed granite and I climbed it for the first time. Its funny, I've live in Atlanta or its suburbs my whole entire life and never climbed it until now. Boy was it a doozie for my untrained muscles that prefer to be stationary. But with a few small breaks I made it! Do you know how embarrassing it is to see fat old people go trucking by like its nothing while you gasp on the sidelines? Yeah, its an ugly thing. Oh, and whoever came up with the idea for a gumpole of disease is a gross nasty person and so is everyone who has since contributed.
So that was last weekend and this past weekend I went on an awesome adventure too! I took a walk with my roommate and the dogs at this bird sanctuary. It was a nice paved path and very mild. Lanie is still all wrapped up and stitched up and wearing her shirt and bootie but she was having a balst! We eventually came to the end of the path and then wandered along a foot path around the swamp (as a side note, the swamp is actually trash juice from the dump but the juice has percolated through the ground so its not stinky like trash). Then we headed up and along some train tracks. We crossed a creek and the had to climb a huge huge hill. It was awesomely difficult but once we got to the top there was a stone quarry! Not the kind in movies that we would swim in but a big barren hole in the ground that they were making sand from. We saw a huge deer leaping among the brush way down at the bottom of the cliff. The weather was perfect and it was tons of fun! Oh, and its only like 3 miles from my house!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

I know, I'm running WAY behind: The STRUT

So I love to work the East Atlanta Strut even though festivals are a) not profitable, b)a LOT of work, and c) exhausting. The Strut is fun because I get to see so many fun people! Its really a blast! I get there at 7:30, set up, wait, eat, eat, hang out, eat and throughout it all I sell some stuff.
I love these guys. There were 2 green dressed guys and they were FANTASTIC. The parade was a lot of fun and very silly. I love how big the STRUT is getting and sometimes wish I could volunteer instead of work a booth.
Look at my sock monkeys. I sold 2 out of the 5. I think I may make some more. They're a great way to use up scraps since they are 100% stuffed with quilt scraps I trim off. The one with red ears and red arms and the argyle one went to live with other people. I'm happy for the little guys.
My next fest is the Cabbagetown Chomp and Stomp. Its also a chili cookoff so you MUST go check it out! Its a blast but get there before noon or the chili will be gone. It always goes fast and this year will be bigger than ever!